So, once again the frenzy begins.  Each year it seems that the celebration of Christmas begins more and more early; this year many stores had decorations up even before Halloween was over!  Today we are supposedly observing Thanksgiving Day, but I wonder at what it is we are being thankful for and to whom we are thanking.  In light of the chaos of “Black Friday” and the horrific behavior of those who fight as though they are battling some implacable enemy rather than just another poor soul trying to get presents for their loved ones…the idea of their having blood in their eyes and anger in their hearts for any and all who get in the way is another thing.

Anyway, this ‘thanksgiving’ thing; what is it all about?  What is this national injunction to be thankful and for what are we supposed to be thankful?  Many feel they have little or nothing to be thankful for; in light of recent events in our troubled world and nation, it does seem difficult to be thankful.  Between the very real threat of terrorism, the rising concern over the Russian and Chinese military threat and our own natural proclivity for invective and violence, perhaps one thing we can be thankful for is the ability to pull the covers over our heads and sing that old country song, Make the World Go Away! 

An observation I’ve made several times is that many with a great deal to be thankful for often are not; indeed many of the über rich seem only focused on the idea of wanting more (I’m reminded of the quote attributed to JD Rockefeller regarding how much is enough; “…just a little more…” This past Sunday, Pastor Jay Thomas remarked that enjoying what you have is not necessarily bad; recognizing that all good things come from our Father helps keep things in perspective, but still there is the nagging itch when I consider so many within a five minute drive of where I live who have little or nothing physically for which to be thankful.  I’ve spent time at Antioch Baptist Church in Durham on Christ-mas day with their ministry to the homeless; the thought of living on the street without even the most basic shelter to call home is beyond my imagining and I often do think of them while in our new home.  What is amazing is the thankfulness and grace that many of those bereft of all earthly comforts have; it is as if deprived of all the ‘normal’ things they realize that what really matters cannot be counted on a spreadsheet or inventory of belongings.  So, thankfulness; what is it?  It is an understanding that no matter how much or how little in the way of possessions we have, it is all ephemeral and like a wisp of smoke that is quickly blown away in the wind.  Friends who stand with you matter far more than any earthly riches, especially that one Friend who is always ready to listen, to comfort and encourage us who call to Him in faith.  I do have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving Day; chief among those is the God who called me and continues to lead me Homeward and those of like faith who walk with me as we journey Home. 

Anything else is really just gravy; yes such is nice (friends, family, health and home), but all that is really needful is my eyes fixed on the One who gave so much so I could arrive Home one day.

 

For some time I have served with Our Children’s Place; at times I wonder at the value of that service when surrounded by so many who are successful in their own fields while all that I’ve managed to accomplish is to survive almost 24 years in prison and discover that my professional life is over.  One thing keeps me involved with these incredible folks, I have seen first-hand during those 23+years the impact of prison on a family, particularly the children that are bereft of a normal family life.

In some instances the men I met ‘inside’ sired children from several different women, being little more than sperm donors; mostly though there were men struggling with the unforeseen circumstances of how to be a father to their sons and daughters when their interaction with them is limited to the weekly visitation if they are fortunate to be housed in a prison close enough to make this possible.  Since becoming involved with Our Children’s Place, my reading on the subject has revealed factors I’d not thought about before; how these children are worse than orphans in many ways. 

Society’s response to the orphan is often automatically one of concern and support; go to any civic or religious group and ask for them to support the orphaned child and there is an outpouring of sympathy and care for those children whose parent or parents have died.  Their classmates in school, while not really understanding perhaps the loss that has impacted their friends lives, support them and continue to be friendly toward them.  It is as if all of society rushes to the side of such children; we want to comfort them, even to the point of adoption as I have seen over and over in many of those I know at the Chapel Hill Bible Church.

The response to a child of a prisoner is almost always very different.

The child whose mother or father is taken from them in such a fashion (in a few cases it may be both parents) is not the focus of society’s support and concern.  While perhaps not intending such, we look askance at the child of a prisoner; it is as if we tar them with the same brush we have painted their parent(s) and turn away from them instead of turning toward them.  The shame and stigma of having a parent in prison is very real, the cruelty of these children’s classmates toward them is also a reality that they have to deal with on a daily basis and so often those who would want to help do not understand how to do so. 

Recently Sesame Street has stepped into the picture to help us understand the plight of these children through a teaching package they have entitled, Little Children, Big Challenges: Incarceration.  In this we meet Alex whose father is in prison and seeks to avoid his friends who talk of having their dads help them with building toy cars to play with each other.  In this and the accompanying material, the writers and producers seek to educate us about the challenges that such children face daily; in the case of parents who have been sentenced to life in prison, they are orphans in all but fact as they never again will have a normal life with that parent in their lives.

What can we do to help?  I challenge you to go to your local library and ask for the Sesame Street video; watch it to begin to gain an understanding of how the child of the prisoner is an orphan and needs the same support that we provide others in crisis.  Contact Our Children’s Place and ask how to become involved in financially supporting their efforts to not only raise awareness of the plight of these orphans, but to bring community resource to bear in providing as normal a life as possible for them.  

Depression.

Not a topic that is comfortable in any context, but especially within the church today.  So many teach and/or believe that once you have surrendered your life to Christ that life will be sunshine, lollipops and rainbows everywhere.  As with Job’s friends, when someone does not fit that mold, many question the individual’s walk with Christ; accusations flow and fingers point, but how many harbor their own pain, hiding it to prevent others from treating them in the same way? 

Thankfully I am in a fellowship whose members do “…come alongside…” the person who is hurting, from whatever source.  Still, it is hard to ask for help; when I see others in the body at the Chapel Hill Bible Church who are wrestling with much worse, how can I ask for help when they seem so much more in need of that help?  Indeed, one of the men I would go to for counselling is himself struggling with a battle with cancer; what is depression when compared with something that could take his life?

As I related in an earlier blog, with Job I can state categorically that I do know that my Redeemer lives; that He holds onto me is a solace and comfort that is beyond measure particularly now that my strength is all but gone. 

A day is coming for all of us in Christ when such pain and confusion will be forever banished; for now, we do struggle and wander in a dark world.  I have no answers or expectation of when (if?) this greyness will end, but I do know that I am loved and, as Elisabeth Elliot quoted so many times, “…underneath are the everlasting arms.” (Deuteronomy 32:27)

In John Bunyan’s allegorical work, The Pilgrim’s Progress, we follow the trials and ultimate triumph of the main character Christian as he goes from his initial state in the slough of despond to the celestial city.  Throughout his adventures (misadventures at times) there are times when those who seem to teach that once saved all your troubles are behind you are firmly repudiated.  Indeed, looking at the life of early church fathers such as Paul also seem to deny the nonsense of life as a believer being one of sunshine, lollipops and rainbows.

In recent weeks this thought has been greatly reassuring; to refer to Bunyan’s Christian, there are times when it seems that I still wallow within my own slough of despond despite having many times seeing real evidence in my life of God’s amazing work of grace.  Part of my struggle has been a result of my struggle to find meaningful work as well as being able to fit within the body of believers in a way that will benefit the kingdom and enable me to grow as a disciple of our Savior. 

At present I seem to have reached a nadir in my walk with Christ; it seems more and more difficult for me to do more than put one foot in front of another, to take the next breath seems all that I can do.  My daily reading of Scripture has all but stopped and my prayer life is pretty much nonexistent but for the inarticulate groan of a soul in torment. 

Today was a new low; while sitting in the auditorium, listening to the worship team rehearse before the start of the first service, they began going over a song that declares that in Christ we can change the world.  Something in me seemed to wither; I could not believe that it was possible for me to do anything to change the world.  It seems that the world has left me standing outside with little or nothing for me to do other than keep out of the way.  What previously had been a source of joy and refreshment now felt grating and dry, so I left and drove home.

As Job once stated, “…I know that my Redeemer lives…” (Job 19:25 ESV); that is a truth that I can still grasp and am thankful that it is His hand that holds me, not the other way around.